Alone and Free
by Lights In The Dark
Summary: Elsa and Anna have been living in the castle of Arendale for years, with only themselves for company. Anna, perpetually curious, has always wondered what happened to the city... and its inhabitants. When certain truths about Elsa's feelings come to light, it starts her on an unexpected journey to reclaim her past. Elsanna. Icest.
1. Prologue

Blood. Fire. Shadows were everywhere, running, fighting, or fleeing from burning homes. Boulders rained from the sky, crushing everything in their path. And all of it, without a sound.

"Come on, Elsie, tell me!" Anna whined loudly from the floor. She gasped, tiny hands coming up to cover her mouth. "Is it a fe- fet- festible?"

Elsa didn't respond. She couldn't.

"Elssiiieee! You've been up there forever! I wanna see!"

One of the dark ships swept through the black waters into the docks, letting more figures loose. Shadows on horses rushed toward them, through them. Some fell, but they didn't get up.

"ELSIE! LET! ME! SEE!"

The chair wobbled as Anna tried to climb up. A second later, she was on the ground crying, clutching her hand to her chest. Elsa's throat hurt and her ears were ringing from her own shout. It didn't matter, though, because Anna hadn't seen.

And she never would.

A chill ran down Elsa's body as she looked back at the carnage. The figures from the ship had won their skirmish and were rushing in the direction of the castle.

'They're coming.'

The room had already been cold enough to frost the window Elsa was looking through, but now ice coated the walls.

'They can't get to Anna.'

Spikes slowly protruded from the walls and ceiling. Outside, a clear night turned into a blizzard in a matter of seconds.

The eldest princess's head swam; she barely made it off of the chair before collapsing. It took what felt like ages for her drooping eyes to find her still-crying sister, who was watching the growing icicles in terror.

Elsa dragged herself to Anna, pulling her close. "S' ok," she whispered. "I... got... you..."

The last thing Elsa remembered before passing out was Anna burying her face in Elsa's chest. She really couldn't blame her for wanting the warmth; for the first time in her life, even Elsa felt cold.


	2. Chapter 1

**AN: Hey. Sorry if anyone was looking forward to a story without author's notes, but the only reason the prologue didn't have one was because it was so short. Anyway, thank you for reading. Another thank you to those who reviewed or followed. Now a quick clarification: if it wasn't painfully obvious that Anna and Elsa were children in the last chapter, my bad. They were, and that is pretty important.**

 _Several years later..._

"Made-it-to-the-corr-i-dor, I-can-even-see-the-door, Little jump-little jump, now-a-leap. Don't-let-the-wood-hit-your-feet. On-ly-try-to-touch-the-ice, On-to-Sis-who's-really-nice!"

Anna landed solidly on both feet (thankfully) right in front of the library door. Looking back at the hallway, she grinned at the assortment of wooden and ice planks that made up the floor. She'd finally gotten the hang of the little skipping game she'd invented.

Turning back to the door, Anna straightened her dress, performed her signature knock, and swung open the door without waiting for a response. "HAPPY BIRTHDAY!" she shouted merrily.

At the far end of the room, Elsa continued to read.

Anna waited several seconds before her smile was replaced with narrowed eyes. She walked over to her sister's armchair, making sure every step was heard. She didn't stomp, though. That would be rude. (And it was Elsa's birthday, after all.)

" _Elsa,_ " Anna chided, "It's not nice to ignore people."

Elsa finished the page she was on before looking up.

' _Oh crap.'_

It was _that_ look. You know, the 'You better fix your tone or you're not leaving your room for a week' look.

"Well, _Anna_ ," Elsa chided, "It's also not nice to interrupt someone while they are reading, especially when you've agreed to stop."

Anna chuckled nervously. "Yeah, that probably is. I mean, it isn't. Nice. It isn't nice. ...Sorry."

"I suppose we're even, then," Elsa replied with the subtlest of smiles.

' _Oh, thank god.'_ Anna thought. ' _She's just messing with me.'_ Her body relaxed and she plopped onto the other couch.

Elsa marked her spot with a bookmark, then set the small notebook onto the low table the two pieces of furniture were positioned around. They'd arranged it this way long ago so Elsa could read alone or the two of them could share the couch.

"So," Elsa asked suddenly, "what did you get me?"

Anna's jaw dropped. "Wha- You- Huh?"

"Why so surprised?" The eldest asked, a picture of innocence. "It is my birthday, after all."

"You said not to get you anything!" Anna protested vehemently.

"I say that every year. Hasn't stopped you before."

"Yeah, but... You- You gave a twenty minute lecture about it! Yesterday!"

Elsa shrugged while Anna stared, words abandoning her altogether.

Before long, the platinum blonde's composure cracked. A broad smile broke out across her face as she tried and failed to fight back giggles.

Catching her breath, Elsa took mercy on her sister. "Sorry, I was just having a bit of fun. It's fine if you don't have a present for me."

Anna sighed as her eyes found the floor. "No, I do. It's just... not ready yet."

Elsa moved to sit beside her sister on the couch. "Like I said, Anna, that's already more than I asked for. So chin up, ok?"

"...Ok."

Anna took a breath and her mood changed gears almost instantly. She fixed her big sis with a wide, genuine smile and grabbed her hand. "You're going to love your present. It's a painting. I know that might sound a little scary since you've seen all of my early work from a couple of years ago, and those were bad. Really bad. Like, 'do we still have those, because we should definitely burn them' bad. And you probably thought I gave painting up, but I've been practicing in secret for a really long time, and I've gotten so much better it's crazy."

"I'm sure I'll love it."

"You will, trust me. You're even going to hang it in your room."

Elsa blinked. "Good to know."

"Anyway, what do you want to do for your special day?"

"Oh, you know. The usual."

With an exasperated sigh, Anna moved so she was laying in her sister's lap, looking upwards. "Elsa, you're killing me. We both know that 'the usual' is whatever special activities I happen to come up with. Last year, we made pillow forts. Pillow forts! What was I thinking? You probably outgrew that kind of thing when you were ten!"

Elsa opened her mouth, but was cut off before a word made it through.

"And don't say you didn't, because I noticed that face you made before you 'coughed' and agreed. And your stupid nature walks-slash-rendezvous don't count, either!"

Elsa ran a hand down one of Anna's braids to calm her. The girl huffed and crossed her arms, but stopped her rant.

"I'll admit I was reluctant at first, but you made it fun," the eldest insisted.

The only response was an eye roll.

"I'm telling the truth. ...There must be something I can do to convince you."

With the way Anna's eyes lit up, Elsa immediately knew she shouldn't have said that.

"Well, since you care so much," Anna replied happily, "You can show it by choosing something. By yourself."

Apparently, Elsa had been played.

"Anna, I really don't-"

"No excuses! Come on, you turn eighteen today. Legally, you could be a queen! So make a demand already!"

"There's noth-"

"One activity. Or even a gift. Please, I'm begging you!"

"I- Anna, you're being ridiculous."

In a second, Anna had swung back up to a sitting position, staring intently at her sister. "You hesitated," she said, barely believing it herself. "You want something."

"No-"

"Yes. What is it? Tell me. I'll make it happen, I swear. No judgement." By this point, she was leaning so far forward that Elsa had to move over on the couch.

"I... ice skating. I want to go ice skating."

"You're lying."

"Anna-"

"No!" the redhead shouted, making the other girl flinch. "Sorry. I didn't mean to yell. Just... Elsa, pleasepleasepleeeaaassseee..." she entreated.

Elsa stared at the floor, unconsciously wrapping her arms around her own waist. "I... I want..."

Though Anna's ears were strained to the point of breaking, she didn't hear the next words.

"What? You want what?"

"A kiss," Elsa whispered. Anna swore that she stopped breathing after, though Anna didn't see why.

"That's _it_? That can't be it. We kiss all the time. Good morning kisses, good night kisses... Ok, I guess it isn't _all_ the time. And it normally comes from you, but it's not like I wouldn't want to-"

"On the lips," Elsa forced out. "I want you... to kiss me... on the lips."

Anna waited for the catch, but it never came. After a moment, she shrugged. "...Ok, but I can't do it with you staring at the floor."

Elsa's head whipped around so fast Anna winced. ' _Hello, whiplash,'_ she thought.

" _Anna-"_

"Give me one good reason why I shouldn't."

"I- Look, there's something-"

"Took too long," Anna decided, pecking her sister on the lips before she could react. The redhead's eyes were glued to the elder's expression as soon as she pulled back, and her body practically hummed with excitement. ' _Bam. Done. That wasn't so hard, was it? Silly Elsa.'_

Anna was glad she was paying so much attention because emotions flickered like a flame across Elsa's face. Shock, anger, fear, then... disappointment. She tried to hide it, of course, but Anna wasn't going to let that slide.

' _If she didn't like it, I'll just have to try again.'_

Elsa tried to move back, but Anna's hands were already grasping the back of her neck, firmly - but gently - keeping her in place. Knowing she could be easily overpowered by the older girl, Anna leaned in slowly. Hopefully, whatever weird urge led to the request would be enough to keep Elsa from fighting.

Anna continued on her course until Elsa closed her eyes. Thinking she'd frightened her sister, Anna paused. Yet Elsa didn't pull away, and when Anna applied a bit of pressure to her neck... she leaned _in_ , toward Anna.

' _Oh. Maybe she closed her eyes to enjoy it more? Like, focusing on touch instead of sight? She must really like kisses. Crap, she's still waiting!'_

Hurrying to make up for lost time, Anna brought their lips together a bit harder than intended. Before she could even consider apologizing, cool hands were on her cheeks, pulling her closer.

Anna followed Elsa's example and closed her eyes because, frankly, it was a little strange to stare at someone else's eyelids from up close.

' _Maybe she's onto something here. It does feel nicer this way. Kinda... tingly. A little awkward though, just pressing our lips together.'_

Elsa pulled away after a few seconds. Anna opened her eyes to see clear blue irises and, most importantly, a smile. Unfortunately, it seemed to say, 'You're adorable and I love you,' not necessarily, 'Wow, I really enjoyed that!'. Anna decided to ask, just to be sure.

"So... did you like your gift?" She questioned, fixing her (untouched) hair.

Elsa laughed, much to Anna's surprise. "Yes," she said with mirth in her eyes. "You gave me exactly what I asked for, didn't you?" She ruffled her younger sister's hair -something she'd stopped doing years ago -and glanced at the nearest clock. "Time for my 'stupid nature walk', dear sister. You know the drill."

Anna watched the still-chuckling blonde walk out of the room.

' _Okay, I am officially confused.'_

 **AN: Hi again. I just want to say a few things up front to any who feel like reviewing. (1) Feel free to criticize. I can handle it and want my work to be as good as possible. (2) I love you. Platonically. (3) There are a few things in this chapter that require explanations I haven't given yet. So, if you are confused, that's okay.**


	3. Chapter 2

Notebook in hand, Anna dutifully trudged to what Elsa dubbed 'the safe room', locked herself inside, and placed the key in a small chest so she wouldn't be tempted to use it. She threw herself onto the overly plushy couch, kicked up her feet, and got into thinking mode.

' _Ok, let's recap_ ,' she thought. ' _Elsa wanted_ one thing _for who knows how long but was ashamed and tried to hide it. She finally got it - only after I practically forced her to confess - and then laughed it off.'_

' _What.'_

' _The.'_

' _Heck.'_

* * *

As Anna tried to work out her puzzle, Elsa roamed through the castle, the clack of her heels echoing through the halls. Once she was certain Anna had made it to the "safe room", she let her powers loose. A swirling cloud of snow and ice soon flowed alongside her, repairing the damage and wear brought about by everyday life (read: Anna) and the occasional animal that managed to sneak inside.

Cracks were filled, floorboards were reinforced, and inch by inch, more of the castle was replaced by ice.

Within seconds, the smile she'd been sporting since leaving the library faltered and died.

It wasn't that she'd been faking the expression. Anna's innocent interpretation of her request had lifted the weight of the world off her shoulders, if only for a moment. How could she not laugh from the sweet relief flooding through her veins?

No, the smile hadn't been fake; it had been overwhelmed by guilt. Elsa was fairly good at managing that emotion after all these years, but this ritual never failed to shatter the walls she built to contain it.

' _I froze my parents' kingdom, scared off their people, separated them from their daughter, and to top it off, I'm slowly turning their castle to ice. I probably couldn't be a worse daughter if I tried.'_

Elsa sighed, but her mouth still managed a sad approximation of a smile.

' _Funny. That's the first time in a while that "lusted after my sister" wasn't in that list.'_

Elsa couldn't bring herself to think it this time.

' _I mean... I know I've been attracted to her in the past, but she's also the only person around for miles. I'm probably just... frustrated. Like those "romantic novels" talk about.'_

' _Maybe the first kiss cured me. No sparks, no fireworks... that was probably the most disappointing moment in my entire life. The way she acted - no, the way she acts - shows that she's completely oblivious. She probably doesn't even know what sexual attraction is. I suppose I did gloss over that topic when I gave her "the talk".'_

' _I wish I could say the second kiss meant something, but I know it only happened because I didn't hide my reaction well enough. Anna was making sure her big sister liked her present. She obviously cares, but... not like that.'_

Funny how something that had made her so relieved before was now a source of angst.

' _I'm a horrible sister, aren't I?'_

' _I need to be better. I need to acknowledge that I had a problem and then move on. Now that I know the why of it, that shouldn't be too hard.'_

Elsa's slow steps became faster and more purposeful. She would be better.

Soon, Elsa passed what had once been the portrait room. The few art pieces that hadn't been destroyed in the incident had been ruined by water damage, so the walls were covered with some of Anna's better creations. (The paintings really were terrible.)

Elsa always saw different things when she came through this room. Today, it was the large, circular patches of ice that filled in holes in the walls. The sight was enough to make her lose her determined stride.

' _The castle would literally collapse without my ice holding it together, yet all I feel is guilt. Why can't logic trump emotion for once?'_

' _Maybe because it was you who damaged it in the first place,'_ a sinister voice whispered in response.

' _Shut up. I'm not dealing with you today.'_

Knowing her inner demons wouldn't leave her alone if she continued her rounds, Elsa snapped her fingers. The ice cloud dispersed, racing off to repair the rest of the castle faster than the eye could see.

' _I was a little behind schedule anyway.'_

* * *

 _...checked up with the dockmaster today, as per King's request. Travelled from castle to dock by coach. 40 kroner. Dockmaster understands situation, but claims dock is past capacity; space problem, not money problem. Could force civilian ships to beach. Compensation? Suggest 500 kroner per week. Won't offset cost, but treasury is low. Oslen heavily invested in fish market, will try for veto. Likely some support, but not unanimous. Food supply manageable for three months even without fishermen._

 _Returned to castle by coach. Shared with commoners for sake of time. They looked shocked when charged 40. Suspect coachmaster is overcharging castle personnel. Suggest..._

Anna slammed the notebook shut and tossed it onto the big table in the center of the room.

"That's what Elsa reads for fun?! My head hurts and I haven't even finished a page!"

The redhead sighed loudly. Her attempt to make sense of Elsa's behavior had gotten her nowhere, so she decided to take a peek at her book. Elsa was pretty defensive of her reading material, so she figured it would at least be something good.

' _Obviously, I was wrong.'_

Glancing at the half-frozen clock on the safe room's mantle, Anna let out another disgruntled noise.

' _Ugh, it's only been thirty minutes. Well, I guess I have Solitaire... Or maybe I can build a nice house of cards...'_

* * *

Elsa had only just made it to Arendelle's outer walls when she heard the first blast of a heralding horn. By the second, she'd summoned an ice ladder and was halfway up. The third saw her crouching behind the battlements, invisible to those below.

Elsa took a minute to calm her racing heart. The herald was (theoretically) expecting someone to come all the way from the castle, so the message always came after several minutes of silence.

The first time Elsa had heard the horn, she'd been scared out of her wits. It had been pure luck that Anna had been napping because the horn could be heard (faintly) from anywhere in the castle, with one notable exception.

Now, it was mostly an inconvenience, a yearly reminder of what had happened so long ago.

"Attention! I come bearing a message from his majesty King Agnarr and her majesty Queen Iduna, the rightful rulers of Arendelle!"

Apparently, the herald was starting early.

"Nearly a decade ago, this great city was unjustly taken from its people and the crown. It was plunged into eternal winter, and two great treasures were lost to us. In all forms of law, whether mundane or divine, retributive action would be justified, nay, expected."

As the man paused to take a breath, Elsa carefully peeked over the battlements. As expected, the herald and two dozen soldiers were positioned before the city gates. She could barely see them through the icy fog, but it was obvious they were struggling to maintain their posture in the biting cold. She would've felt sorry for them if she hadn't already downgraded the usual blizzard to these more tolerable conditions.

"Yet even though such action would be proper, and though _no one would blame them_ , the crown is merciful. It, _again_ , extends this most generous proposal: whomever or whatever is responsible for these infractions will receive a full pardon and anonymity if Arendelle, Princess Anna, and Princess Elsa are returned. In case said being doesn't possess the intelligence or vocabulary required to understand these terms, that means it need only hand over the things it stole, and it can leave freely, without its identity being revealed to the public."

' _Well, that's about the same as last year's proposal. The jab at my intelligence is new, but I guess they have no way of knowing I've continued my education. Or maybe the herald is improvising again.'_

"You have te- _one_ _minute_ to respond."

Elsa abandoned her observations and sat down, leaning her back against the battlements. For the next few seconds, all she heard was the low moaning of the wind. She hoped they'd just leave quietly this time.

"You know what!?"

' _Damn.'_

"Every year, I have to leave my home and my family and travel days to this godforsaken place, just to reason with some monster that can't be reasoned with!"

' _Not the worst thing he's said...'_

"If you're listening - and I hope you're listening - I hope you enjoy your empty wasteland and the skeletons you have for company! I hope that you're happy about ruining the lives of thousands of people and WASTING MY TIME!"

' _Why does this have to be on my birthday?'_ Elsa asked herself desperately. ' _Why is it always my birthday?!'_

Elsa stayed pressed against the battlements for a long while, arms securely around her knees. She didn't cry - a significant victory - but the storm outside turned brutal once she was sure they'd had enough time to pass.

' _I need Anna.'_

* * *

The long trek through the frozen city to the castle helped take the sting out of the herald's words. Elsa was grateful for it; it would be extremely suspicious to come back from her walk so upset.

As Elsa passed through the castle gates, she straightened her back and lifted her head proudly.

' _Okay, time to conceal. Anna will make things better like she always does. I just need her to work her magic.'_

' _Speaking of...'_

' _This infatuation ends today. I'll just need to be sure to fulfill my... needs... more frequently, and the problem should solve itself. If I focus on being her sister and guardian, there's no way this can go further.'_

' _After all, it's not like Anna's going to be the one to change our relationship. She's way too innocent for that.'_

 **A/N: Obvious foreshadowing is obvious. See you next chapter!**


	4. Chapter 3

**A/N: I am really sorry for taking this long to update. (So long that it might be a good idea to reread the previous chapters. Luckily, that shouldn't take long; we aren't that far in yet.) On a completely unrelated note, this chapter is roughly twice as long as normal. So, you have that. Anyway, enjoy.**

A few days after her birthday, Elsa was sitting on a high-backed chair in her favorite spot in the castle, a small alcove in one of the many hallways. It was thoroughly unspectacular, without so much as a window or painting to call attention to it. One table, two plain chairs, and a little rug were all that occupied the space. The princess assumed that the architects and decorators didn't see the point of putting much effort into this area, since this hall only led to the servants' quarters. She didn't blame them. It was a large castle, after all.

Elsa smiled and took a sip of hot water from her mug as her train of thought travelled down familiar tracks.

' _The servants may have appreciated a little more effort, of course. A little decor could brighten up the hallway and show them that their work doesn't go unnoticed. Then again, the servants would also be responsible for cleaning whatever decorations were added. That would be a bit of a backhanded gift, wouldn't it?'_

Elsa rested her elbows on the table and cradled the mug in both hands, enjoying the warmth that spread to her fingers. She brought it closer to her face and breathed in the water vapor rising from the liquid. It was scentless, of course, but warm and refreshing.

She'd been trying to reason her way through this puzzle for a few weeks now, but she was hardly in a hurry. On mornings like these, she was content to ponder, rather than argue one way or the other.

' _Perhaps-'_

"Hey, Elsa!"

Water spilled over the table as Elsa shot up to her feet. She desperately forced down the magic threatening to escape her, barely stopping herself from freezing everything nearby.

Anna was up early. _Very_ early.

The eldest plastered on a smile to cover her shock. "Anna. Hi. I mean, good morning! I trust you slept well?"

Anna's eyes shifted from the spilled water (which was now starting to drip onto the floor) to her sister, her expression morphing from surprised to apologetic.

"I am so sorry," she said quickly. "I didn't mean to scare you. I know that you're- that you, uh, don't like that kind of thing. ...Good morning."

"Good morning," Elsa said (for the second time). Trying to get past the lull in conversation and maybe save a little face, she continued. "I wasn't _scared,_ just, uh, startled."

"Right. My bad."

Elsa had half a mind to reprimand her for that comment - "my bad" is hardly a statement befitting of a princess - but that would make things even more awkward. She made a mental note to mention it later.

"So... breakfast?" Elsa offered.

"Actually, I already ate. I did want to talk to you about something, though."

Elsa gestured for her to proceed, feeling more comfortable now. Her magic had finally settled down and, she reminded herself, this was _Anna_ she was talking to.

"I was wondering if... maybe... we don't _have_ to, but it would be nice if... we could go outside today. Together."

Elsa sighed. "Anna-"

"That's okay! Just me, then?"

Elsa considered it. Anna had been awfully fidgety lately. Elsa's birthday had given her a distraction, but it would probably be only a couple more days before she got moody. Elsa didn't like moody Anna. "I suppose that's alright. Where and how long?"

"Well, I didn't really plan it out or anything... but I'll start out by going to the market square. The shops look so pretty in the snow. And it's right at the end of the bridge, so it's not like I could avoid it anyway. Then I'll go the docks. Most of the fjord is frozen, and the ice is really thick in that area, so I want to see if I can get inside some of the ships stuck out there. I'll be super careful, I promise. After that, I'll go to the mountainy area and get some flowers to spruce up the castle. Oh, along with the usual berries. Duh. And then I'll head back and maybe take a peak over the outer walls. I'll be back before dinner."

By the end of Anna's explanation, Elsa had stopped paying attention to the words, too absorbed in how Anna's teal eyes shined with excitement and her arms waved as she spoke. ' _Gods, she's beautiful. And she's been thinking about this for weeks, at the least. I wish- Wait a second.'_

" _What did you just say?"_

"That I'll be back before dinner?" Anna tried hopefully. In stark contrast to the constant eye contact just moments before, she wouldn't look at her sister. That in itself proved she'd been banking on Elsa's inattention.

"I've told you a thousand times, _stay away from the outer walls._ "

At one point, Anna would have protested. Instead, she stared at the wooden floor. "Yes, Elsa."

The older woman stepped forward and cupped Anna's cheek, tilting the younger girls head up to face her. Elsa held the position until dejected eyes met hers. Injecting as much care as she could into her tone, Elsa spoke. "I know you don't understand sometimes, but my rules exist for a reason."

"Then why don't you just tell me the reason?" Anna asked, frustration leaking into her tone.

Elsa frowned. "It's... complicated."

Anna pulled away roughly. "That's not good enough, Elsa."

"You're just going to have to trust me."

"That is so un-"

" _ANNA!"_

The shout left complete silence in its wake. Anna, whose hands had curled into trembling fists, clamped her mouth shut, trying to contain herself.

Elsa waited.

"I won't go near the walls," Anna spat out. "Can I still go out?"

"Yes," Elsa said, intentionally making her response speedy and sure. She knew hesitating would make Anna accuse her of demanding trust without giving it. They'd been down this road before.

"Okay."

"I love you, Anna. I'm just trying to protect you."

Anna was silent for longer than Elsa would have liked, but she did respond, if curtly. "I know."

With that, she was gone.

Elsa sighed. ' _This isn't over.'_

Elsa longingly looked back to her alcove - the one place in the castle without a speck of ice - but she knew she wouldn't be able to relax until the other shoe dropped.

' _I wish she would just listen to me.'_

Feeling her powers shift restlessly within, Elsa headed to the library for a book. Kai's journals were too heavy for a distraction; what she needed right now was a good adventure story. Besides, she'd already read through the journals a thousand times. They had no more secrets left to give.

* * *

After grabbing her dagger and matching belt from their hiding space by the main entrance, Anna left the castle, slamming the wooden doors behind her. (Or she would have, if they weren't so heavy. In reality, it was more of a soft thump.) It was a bit cold, but she soldiered on. Going back for a coat and mittens would ruin her dramatic exit, and she wasn't about to give Elsa that satisfaction. Luckily, she'd had the foresight to wear boots with her winter dress.

Anna stomped along the snowy bridge leading to town, kicking white powder high into the air... and wincing when she had to walk through the resulting mist.

' _Wow, I suck at being angry. I need to work on that.'_

In her defense, she didn't have a lot of practice. Anna had been a handful when she was younger, but Elsa had somehow honed the ability to navigate Anna's mood swings gracefully. She'd become a master in the arts of distraction, intimidation, and bribery. (Chocolate had been more plentiful back then.)

Eventually, Anna grew up a little. She stopped throwing temper tantrums so often and - unfortunately for Elsa - the old tactics stopped working as well as before. Anna would never forget the look on Elsa's face when she'd made an ultimatum - continue your studies or lose your chocolate privileges - and Anna had said no. She would also never forget the lecture she got as soon as the elder sister recovered from her shock. Anna swore that Elsa's icy behavior actually made the room colder. Shivering, she'd picked up her pen and continued her writing exercises.

The biggest fight - well, the longest - had come a few years ago. Anna had gotten tired of Elsa's constant hovering and demanded her own room. (Contrary to Elsa's belief, Anna did _not_ need to be reminded to make her bed every morning. _She was_ _getting there, dangit!_ ) Elsa was... not pleased. Three months of arguing and two full weeks of _complete silence_ later, Elsa finally gave in.

They'd both been so relieved to have each other back that Anna didn't move out of the room for another month.

Since then, it had been mostly peaceful around the castle. There were some hiccups, but the majority were small and quickly dealt with. The only issue they _really_ fought about was this one, but it was coming up more and more frequently as time went on.

' _I don't understand why this is such a big issue to her. I wish she would just listen to me.'_

Anna quickly reached the market square. As usual, the area was covered with snow, completely untouched except for a few animal tracks. Anna made a mental note to check them out later.

* * *

Maybe it was the fight with Elsa, but the outing Anna had been daydreaming about for ages wasn't as much fun as she'd thought it would be.

The ships had turned out to be devoid of clues about what had happened all those years ago. They were perfectly intact, except for the sails that had been torn to shreds by years of heavy winds. After climbing up the netting that hung from the side of some of the ships, Anna found pretty much what she had expected. Oars, rope... other nautical things...

Inside the ships, she'd found supplies (mostly food), but not enough to indicate that they'd belonged to merchants. There _were_ an unusually large number of cots in all of the ships, but Anna was unable to find any personal belongings. Most tellingly, there wasn't a single scrap of paper to be found, even in the captain's cabins.

Either everyone had neatly packed up their things and then vanished into thin air with them... or something had intentionally gone through the boats and removed anything of interest.

' _The Guardian is annoyingly thorough,'_ Anna thought.

Anna had been hoping that maybe it would have overlooked the ships, but now she was back to square one.

' _There's nothing in the castle, the houses in the village are all frozen shut, and even the ships have been swept clean. At this point, I'd probably be more successful going around with a shovel and literally digging for the truth!'_

Anna huffed and looked out over the kingdom from her vantage point in the highlands, trying to enjoy the view, with limited success.

Arendelle was sandwiched between deep water and large mountain ranges. The castle and most of the village were on relatively flat land, but as one moved outward, the land rose up, allowing one to see the heart of the kingdom in all its glory.

The castle stands front and center in the frozen fjord like a gladiator after a battle: proud, but clearly worse for wear. Even from this distance, Anna could clearly see the large patches of ice that kept some of the structure from crumbling. They stood out like bruises and scrapes among the light gray stone and green gable roofs. Around the castle, modest homes stood like spectators. They were faceless, pale, and - for the moment - completely silent. Ice and snow had consumed them all.

Winter hadn't claimed everything, though. Anna idley plucked a dandelion from the grassy area where she'd chosen to rest and took in the sight of the green hills surrounding the village. She knew from experience that the tall grass hid many creatures, most of which looked perfectly harmless. As for the others... well, that was the reason for the knife. What Elsa didn't know wouldn't hurt her.

' _It's not like she ever goes outside anyway.'_

Anna forced down her irritation and took a few deep breaths. She lied on her back, focusing on the sweet songs of nearby birds and the warmth of the sun on her skin. Still, she wasn't able to stop her thoughts.

' _It's always warmer out here than in the castle. Maybe if she knew that, she'd-'_

Biting the inside of her cheek, Anna trailed her fingers along blades of grass, forcing herself to appreciate how they tickled her skin. She tried to drown herself in the sounds of insects and the wind blowing through the trees. She even tried focusing on how uncomfortable her winter dress was in the summer heat, but to no avail.

' _I wish Elsa was here. Even if she does have stupid rules.'_

Anna got to her feet and brushed herself off. The usual sense of peace she felt in this place remained elusive, so there was no point in sticking around. She'd also forgotten her basket in the castle, so she had to go get it if she wanted to keep her promise about collecting berries. Luckily, the position of the sun implied it was only one or two o'clock; she could make it if she was quick.

* * *

Anna was in the middle of an internal rant about how inconvenient Arendelle's little climate zones were for choosing an outfit when she absentmindedly trudged into the market square. She didn't notice the sudden stillness in the air or that the animal tracks were far more numerous than before. Her eyes were trained downward to keep her from tripping in the snow, so she didn't see the threat, either. But it would be impossible to miss the blood-curdling growl that cut through the freezing air.

 _*Grrrrr*_

Anna stumbled back, barely stopping herself from falling. Once she looked up, she wished she hadn't. Maybe five meters away, a grey and white wolf glared hatefully at her. It was hunched over with its hackles raised, ready to attack. Behind it, two more wolves stopped sniffing around and eyed her guardedly. After several moments, they cautiously approached, staying behind the first wolf. Anna didn't notice how they limped; she was a little preoccupied with their friend.

A small part of Anna's mind informed her that the angry wolf was probably the alpha, and that the large scar on its face was likely a tribute to a previous battle. The rest of her was torn between running and frantically trying to remember everything she knew about wolves.

' _Wolves are the ones that chase you when you run. DON'T do that. No running.'_

She had to do _something_ , though. Taking in a shaky breath, she tried for the peaceful option.

"O-okay, nice wolves. Niiiccceeee wolves. I don't want to hurt you, and hopefully you don't want to hurt me. So how about I just back away slowly-" she took an experimental step back, "-and you just stay there."

The pack didn't react, and the alpha's growl even seemed to lessen a bit. "That's right. No one needs to be hurt today. Or eaten." Taking another step back, Anna slowly raised her hands.

Suddenly, the alpha snarled and launched himself forward. Anna fumbled for her dagger. Before she could draw, he'd covered half the distance between them and leaped. The human girl took in the wide open jaws and clawed forearms, wishing that she'd just stayed home...

A blue and white blur crashed into the wolf before it reached Anna. The two bodies became a confused tangle of limbs, snarling and growling as they fought for dominance. Anna didn't waste time worrying about her savior; her frantic mind only had enough room for one concern: survival. Seeing the rest of the pack panic, she charged right through them. They could have torn her to shreds in an instant. Instead, they rushed to get out of her way, focused on something behind her.

Anna sprinted toward the castle bridge. Several howls rang out, soon replaced by the sound of more fighting. No more than thirty seconds later, Anna reached her target and risked a glance back. She skid to a stop.

The wolves she'd stumbled into were now locked in battle with another pack. The newcomers were large, fast, and almost completely composed of familiar blue ice. There were at least seven of them, and they were very obviously winning. Anna stared for a moment before her self-preservation instinct kicked back in and sent her fleeing to the castle.

This was the first time she'd ever felt comforted by the presence of stone walls.

* * *

Elsa slowly nudged a black checker piece a millimeter to the right, focusing intently on its position within the square.

' _Nope. Too far.'_

Elsa slowly nudged the checker piece to the left.

' _Better.'_

Deciding it was as centered as it was ever going to get, Elsa eyed its neighbor. It looked like it was a bit too far forward. She shifted her body so she could get a bird's-eye view.

' _Yep, definitely too far forward.'_

With the precision and care of a surgeon, she stretched out a slender finger and moved the piece to its proper position.

' _Perfect.'_

The fancy chess board was loaded with checkers, ready for a quick game. And that game was definitely going to happen... as soon as Anna got back. Of course, that relied on the assumption that she'd calmed down and felt like playing.

' _Gods, what am I doing?'_

It was always like this. Anna would leave to explore, and Elsa would stay in the library worrying. After a certain point, she wouldn't be able to focus on her book, so she'd clean, recite the periodic table backward in French, or set up a game like this one. Anything to keep her mind off Anna.

Rationally she knew she had no reason to worry. Anna knew how important it was to be careful; there was no doctor around to help if she got injured. (Elsa studied everything the castle had about medical practice, and she'd drilled as much of it as possible into Anna's head. Still, both of them knew better than to do anything reckless.) Elsa had also gone out of her way to ensure that nothing living within Arendelle's walls posed a threat to her sister.

She couldn't stop herself from worrying, though.

 _Knock-knock-knock._

' _Finally!'_

Elsa rushed to the door, stopped to collect herself, then calmly opened it. Anna seemed a little out of breath - hardly unusual - but not angry like before. "Hey, sunflower. Did you have a nice day out?"

Without warning, Anna pulled Elsa into a tight hug. The elder sister tensed but returned it, holding just as tight. Then her arms slackened in surprise when Anna buried her head in the crook of Elsa's neck and inhaled audibly.

' _Is she_ smelling _me?'_

"A-Anna...?"

Anna stayed where she was, still breathing deeply. "I- ...Yeah. It was great. I just... missed you."

"Is this about the fight? I'm sorry I yelled at you."

"No, you were right. It's fine."

' _What?'_

"Anna, are you okay? Did something happen?"

Anna hugged tighter, if that was possible. Elsa was suddenly finding it harder to breathe, for more than one reason. "No, nothing happened. I... thought about it and realized I don't want to fight about this anymore. That's all."

' _Ok, let's try that again, but with the truth this time.'_

"So you're giving up?" Elsa probed. "No more asking about visiting the outer walls?"

"Right."

"Really?"

"Really, really."

Elsa waited a few more seconds, but Anna didn't say anything. She also made no move to end the hug. Elsa tried to enjoy it, but it was making her a little uneasy.

"So... did you put the berries in the cold room? I don't want them to go bad."

Elsa felt her sister stiffen. Without thinking about it, she gently rubbed circles in Anna's back until she relaxed again.

"I... forgot about that, actually."

Elsa sighed and made to pull away from the hug. "Ok. Do you want want to play checkers once you get back? I have it set up over there."

Anna pulled Elsa back in, holding her securely in place. "Sure. And... uh, you know what? Why wait? We can play now."

It was a few seconds before Elsa could accept that she'd heard correctly. "Anna, if you don't leave soon, you won't make it back before dinner."

"I know. I don't really feel like going out again. And those berries are just for diversity, right? We have plenty of food."

"Yes, but-"

Anna interrupted, her voice suddenly tired and raw. It "honest" was a tone of voice, this would be it. "Elsa, just let me spend some time with you. _Please_."

"O-of course," Elsa said calmly as her mind screamed with alarm.

' _Something is very, very wrong. What the hell happened out there?!'_

For a second, a traitorous part of her wondered if she'd been as thorough as she'd thought in getting rid of Arendelle's predators.

' _No._ Nothing _is left out there to hurt her. It must be something else.'_

Anna lingered in Elsa's arms until the elder took the initiative and pulled away. They walked to the couch and started the game.

' _That tone, and her behavior... it's not right. It's normal for her to want to spend time with me, but now it is like she_ needs _to. Why would she...? Oh gods, not again. Please, not again.'_

Anna made her first move. Elsa tried not to cry.


	5. Chapter 4

**A/N: I've recently discovered that according to the internet, Elsa's birthday is in December. However, her coronation (as explicitly stated in the movie) takes place in July. In this story, her birthday is in July and will remain that way.**

" _Come on, Elsa! We have to build a snowman!"_

 _The excitable redhead drags her sister by the wrist through snow piled up to their waists. Elsa resists, of course, but Anna is way too strong for her to break away._

" _Anna! You're supposed to be memorizing the capitals of Europe alphabetically, and I'm in the middle of a super boring book. You can't just bring me out her and force me to have fun. I could die!"_

" _Oh, you'll be fine. Trust me."_

 _Suddenly, a massive ice dragon crash-lands a few meters away, sending a huge wave of snow in their direction. Elsa panics and tries to pull Anna away, but the younger girl doesn't budge. The snow wave breaks on the ground right in front of them, just as she predicted._

 _Elsa urgently tugs on her arm. "Anna, come on! That's the Guardian! It's going to freeze our brains!"_

" _That's where you're wrong, my dear sister," Anna says knowingly. "That dragon isn't here to freeze us. It's here for THE BEST SNOWBALL FIGHT EVER!"_

" _...Are you sure? I don't think-"_

 _Elsa is cut off as a snowball the size of a horse smashes into her, knocking her to the ground and burying her in soft powder._

" _Don't worry, sis! You will be avenged!"_

 _With that war cry, Anna dashes to the side, avoiding three more giant snowballs. There is no cover in sight, but she knows she can do this. She forms thirty snowballs with the speed of a lightning strike, and soon she's fighting back, throwing and dodging all at once._

' _For my sister! For Arendale! For... um... dessert for breakfast!'_

 _The battle is intense and looks like it could go either way, but Anna prevails. She confidently walks up to the ice dragon, who is now breathing heavily and struggling to stand._

" _Looks like I won, ice dragon," she says. "Now, are you going to tell me why you attacked us?"_

" _You... huh.. were right... huh... before," the dragon pants. "I just... huh... wanted to play. I don't have any friends, and I was... huh.. lonely."_

 _While Anna knows the dragon shouldn't have attacked them without warning, she has the kindest, most generous soul in the world. She decides to forgive the poor creature._

" _Well, I'm always up for a good snowball fight, so if you promise to ask nicely next time, you can count on me to play. Elsa, too!"_

" _Ok. Thank you... huh... princess. You are free to go whenever you want. I... huh... am going to go lie down."_

 _As Anna watches the dragon fly away, she is pulled into a ferocious hug. Suddenly, every inch of her is pressed up against her sister._

" _Anna, that was amazing! I was so worried!"_

 _The redhead returns the hug and pulls away just enough to look up at Elsa. She gives her a big smile. "Oh, that? That was nothing."_

 _Elsa's eyes are looking deep into Anna's, shining with pride. "We're going to have dessert for breakfast every day from now on. And tomorrow, we'll go outside the gates! We'll bring some chocolate, have a nice picnic, and meet new people!"_

" _That sounds wonderful! But..." Anna teases, "I think there's one more thing that should be on that list."_

" _There is? No, that can't be right. That would imply I missed something, and I never miss anything."_

 _As Elsa speaks, a dozen shooting stars race across the sky behind her, leaving brilliant trails of light in their wake. Anna giggles as her oblivious sister stares at the ground, deep in thought._

" _I don't... Oh! We never built a snowman. Is that it?"_

" _Nope," Anna says, popping the 'p'._

" _Uh... dessert for lunch?"_

 _Anna moves her arms up from Elsa's waist to rest around her pale neck. "Nope. Do you give up?"_

 _Elsa opens her mouth to speak, but no words come out. Instead, a dark pink tint blossoms on her cheeks._

 _Anna loves seeing her sister blush. It happens very, very rarely, but that makes it all the sweeter. "I'll take that as a yes," she says cheekily._

 _Elsa closes her eyes and Anna leans in..._

 _*Grrrrr*_

 _The sisters break apart and turn to the noise. Just feet away, a feral wolf with a scar on its face snarls, foaming at the mouth. It dashes forward and leaps-_

* * *

Anna gasped and shot up into a sitting position, a hand to her heart. She panted heavily.

' _Way to ruin a perfectly good dream, brain. Good job.'_

She supposed she was lucky her entire night wasn't plagued with nightmares, after what happened the day before. Still, she would have liked the good part of it to last a _little_ longer. Maybe long enough for that picnic. Or at least the kiss. Anna couldn't help but feel disappointed that Elsa had practically laughed at her after the last one. Maybe dream Elsa's reaction would be more appropriate. (Whatever "appropriate" even means in this case.)

Anna didn't like to obsess over negativity, so she just acknowledged her disappointment, then let it go. The more important thing to focus on here was gratitude. Elsa had stayed up well past midnight playing games with Anna, unknowingly helping the younger girl get her mind off her near-death experience. Elsa had seemed a little off, but she was even more affectionate than usual, which was exactly what Anna had needed.

' _Speaking of Elsa...'_

Anna looked over to the clock on her dresser, which was clearly visible from the light pouring in from her window. (She'd forgotten to close the curtains.)

' _Quarter to nine. It's a Monday, so there's no point in going back to bed. Elsa will come to wake me up soon.'_

* * *

After making herself presentable, Anna walked over and enthusiastically swung open the door. She expected an empty hallway. Instead, she was greeted with an impeccably dressed but obviously distressed older sister who was muttering to herself and pacing back and forth.

Anna slammed the door shut. Immediately regretting that action, she rushed to Elsa's gift as fast as possible and threw a light tarp over the canvas. She was back at her door few seconds later, yanking it open to see Elsa turned toward her with her mouth hanging open. (Just slightly. Elsa somehow made it look dignified.)

"Sorry about that. I had to cover your present."

Elsa closed her mouth, but she continued to stare at Anna with far more confusion than the redhead felt was justified.

"Aaannywayyy" Anna continued, "Good morni- Hey!"

Elsa retracted the finger she'd poked Anna with and had the decency to look embarrassed by her action. However, Anna didn't miss how her shoulders relaxed and a tiny smile replaced the near-frantic expression she'd had while pacing. She also took in the dark bags under Elsa's eyes for the first time.

"Elsa, are you okay?"

"I-" Elsa sighed. "Sorry. I didn't sleep well."

' _No, no, no. You are not getting off that easily. Not when you look like that.'_

" _Why_ didn't you sleep well?" Anna pressed.

"I- ...It would be best for us to drop this topic, sunflower. It doesn't matter; I was wrong. Besides, we're going to be late for breakfast if we don't hurry."

Anna crossed her arms and answered that excuse with the dead silence it deserved.

"...Don't say I didn't warn you," Elsa finally said. Her eyes focused on the air just to the right of Anna's head, and she clasped her hands in front of her. "Last night, you were acting strangely. You wouldn't leave my side for a second, and you were so sweet and generous... You let me start first on every game. You didn't complain once when I beat you. You even _turned down_ an excuse to get out of the castle."

Anna was starting to get a little annoyed. "So, what? It's a crime to be nice to my sister now?" She forced down the guilt that threatened to make an appearance. She knew she'd been acting suspiciously because she was, in fact, hiding something. Still, these things Elsa was listing out were _good_ things, and Anna hated the implication that she wasn't like that normally.

"Anna... there's a fine line between 'nice' and 'servile'. You weren't acting like _you_ , you were acting like you wanted our time together to be happy and loving, and _only_ that. It was like you thought you were going to lose me."

' _Well, she's not entirely wrong. For a minute there, I did think I was going to lose her... and everything else.'_

Elsa sighed in the same way as a defendant who was about to plead guilty. "It was almost like... you were trying to make a perfect last memory."

Anna clenched her fists. ' _I take it back.'_

"I was wrong, obviously. I'm sorry for thinking that way. But the last time you acted like that-"

" _Seriously!?_ I can't believe you!"

Anna saw the tired, defeated look in her sister's eyes. She just didn't care.

"Yes, I tried to run away!" she yelled. "One time, YEARS ago, with every intention of coming back! But I promised you - I swore - that I wouldn't do that again. And you think thought that I'd just break my word and slip off in the middle of the night?!"

"Anna-"

"For all I know, you were waiting out here the whole night!"

" _Anna-_ "

"You still don't trust me!"

" _Enough!"_

Part of Anna was satisfied, in a twisted way, that she'd gotten Elsa to yell when she obviously didn't want to. The rest of her was too angry and hurt to care.

"I _do_ trust you, Anna."

"Well it sure doesn't seem like it!"

Elsa ground her teeth in an obvious attempt to keep her cool. "I didn't stay out here all night. I've been here for an hour at most."

"Oh, well that changes _everything_! Not."

"I wanted to, though."

Despite herself, Anna was taken aback by her sister's honesty.

Elss chuckled sadly. "And that's just the tip of the iceberg. If I listed out all the precautions I _wanted_ to take, you'd probably run at the first opportunity."

And there it was again. "I'M. NOT. RUNNING. What part of that is so hard for you to understand?"

"That... wasn't what I was trying to say. I'm sor-"

"Stop apologizing! You can't apologize for something and then keep doing it; that's not how it works."

Elsa took a deep breath and slowly let it out. "Okay. Let me try this again: I know that my reaction to the idea of you leaving was extreme. I _am_ sorry for that. - Anna, please let me finish. - That said, I didn't act on my feelings, as much as I wanted to. Once you went to your room for the night, I did my rounds, locked up the place as usual, and went to bed. I can't say that I got any sleep, but I didn't leave my room until dawn, and I only allowed myself to come here about an hour ago. I... I consider that to be a display of trust."

"You- Ugh! You shouldn't have had to lose sleep over this. You shouldn't have thought I was going to leave in the first place!"

Elsa shrugged helplessly. "I don't know how to turn my feelings off, Anna. Do you?"

Silence was her answer.

* * *

Breakfast that morning was a solemn event. Elsa was lost in regret and Anna was trying to figure out if she still had the right to be angry. She was leaning towards "no", as frustrating as that was.

The sisters were eating at a small rectangular table in a study-turned-dining room. It was covered with a fancy white tablecloth and was set each morning with fresh napkins, (unused) candles, fragile dishes, gleaming wine glasses (filled with water), a tea tray, and far more utensils than Anna thought was necessary. The setup, of course, came at Elsa's insistence.

The room had wooden floors with several ice planks, a working fireplace, lively red walls, and some paintings that had survived the freeze. Two of the walls were lined with large windows, letting in plenty of warm sunshine that was completely at odds with the current mood. Anna had been the one to pick the room.

As they ate their oatmeal, Elsa's eyes never left the table, and Anna's looked everywhere else.

"I'm sorry," she finally said.

"Me, too."

* * *

The next part of the day, as advertised, was tutoring. The sisters cleared everything off the table. Anna retrieved quills, paper, and ink (all of which they seemed to have an infinite supply of, much to Anna's dismay). Elsa gathered a few heavy books, a clipboard, and a large rolled-up piece of paper.

After they settled in, Elsa took the clipboard and flipped through a few pages. A few seconds later, she covered her eyes and groaned. "You're kidding."

"Huh?"

Elsa looked back up and smiled wryly, sliding the clipboard over. Raising an eyebrow, Anna scanned the current page until she reached today's lesson plan.

' _Monday, July 20th: The World Outside the Walls'_

Anna banged her head on the table. "Really, Elsa?!"

' _Also, ow.'_

"In all fairness, I made the lesson plan months ago. I had no idea this would happen."

Anna continued her assault on the defenseless table, a little more lightly than before. A few seconds later, she heard a snicker. Then another. Anna paused, not quite believing her ears.

"...You have to admit, it's a little funny."

Anna could practically hear the smile Elsa was trying to fight, and sure enough, it was there when Anna looked up. "This is _so_ not funny."

"Oh, come on. First the fight about you visiting the walls, then I nearly have a breakdown about the thought of you leaving, and now it _just so happens_ that the first topic of the day is the outside world? That's a pretty interesting coincidence, don't you think?"

"No." Anna hid her head in the crook of her elbow, determined to ignore her sister's lame attempt at humor. She heard Elsa's chair briefly scrape along the floor. She closed her eyes and refused to budge.

There was nothing for several seconds. Anna didn't even hear Elsa walk over, though she was _certain_ that it was impossible to sneak in those heels.

The silence stretched on long enough that Anna had to actively fight the urge to abandon the darkness and look up.

' _I swear, if she left the room, I'm going to be so-'_

" _What's wrong_?" came a whisper right next to Anna's ear. She barely stopped herself from jumping and gripped the sleeves of her dress as a not-quite-unpleasant shiver trailed down her spine. " _Don't you enjoy a little irony?"_

A pause.

"Anna?" The voice was louder and further away, but still playful.

Poke.

" _~Anna~"_

Poke-poke-poke.

Anna tried, she really did. But she couldn't stop the smile from breaking out.

"~ _There it is!~"_

Anna groaned and sat up, accepting defeat. "I hate you."

Elsa was grinning broadly, not deterred in the least. "No, you ~ _love~_ me _."_

Anna sighed. Despite her best efforts, her good mood had been restored. ' _If Elsa's joy was a disease, the world would be screwed. Just saying.'_

"Fine, it's funny. Can we _please_ get back to the lesson, now?"

"So demanding," joked Elsa as she walked back to her seat. "Who do you think you are, a princess or something?"

Anna rolled her eyes and said nothing.

' _It doesn't happen often, but once she gets started... yeesh.'_

Elsa sat down and cleared her throat. In an instant, she was royalty again. She smiled politely at Anna and began.

"Let's start local. What can you tell me about the area immediately outside Arendelle?"

"It's cold."

"Anna."

"Oh, did you mean beyond the blizzard? My bad." Anna grinned, then schooled her features and continued. (It still took her longer to do that than Elsa, but she was getting there.) "There were several towns outside the city that were part of the kingdom. One or two were port towns and a couple more mined coal, but the rest worked with lumber. We don't know if they're still around, though."

Elsa nodded. "And beyond that?"

"The nearest kingdom is Jarlsberg. It has sea access, but their kingdom was kind of isolationist, right?"

Another nod.

"Yeah. And since they weren't interested in stealing our trade partners - or doing anything, really - we made a formal agreement to not kill each other."

"That's typically known as an 'alliance'," Elsa said with a hint of a smile.

"Same difference. Now, where was I? Oh! Across the sea, but still pretty close, we have the Southern Isles. We used to have a few trade issues with them, but we always managed to avoid war. There's also Weselton..."

 **A/N: I think I'm done with most of the world building and the initial angst! Now I can focus more on the Elsanna. (Ok, there is the thing with the Guardian that I need to explain, but I think that's the last major, pressing issue.)**

 **You may have noticed that the dream sequence is (a) ridiculous and (b) in present tense. Both were intended, but feedback would be appreciated. My reasoning: (a) Anna can definitely be ridiculous at times, and I wanted to have fun showing the world through her eyes. (b) Present tense seems more... "in the moment", like dreams are. By the way, the dream kiss would've been more innocent than you probably think. I tried to make that clear in Anna's really low-key reaction to it. (That said, dream Anna is a couple of steps ahead of real Anna. So, it isn't _completely_ innocent.)**

 **This won't be relevant for quite a while, but I'm going to make Iduna have the same hair color as Elsa. (In cannon, she's a brunette.)**


	6. Chapter 5

**A/N: Change of plans. I meant to have some Elsanna this chapter and have the next one try to explain Elsa's motivations and the "Guardian" situation, but I ended up switching the order.**

It was midday and the sun was shining brightly through the library windows. Anna had decided to spend her scheduled "recess" (as Elsa seemed to take such pleasure in calling it) with her sister. That was a wonderful decision, as it turned out. Elsa was in a particularly good mood that day; she'd practically insisted on reading to Anna. Usually Anna had to pester her for days before she caved.

So here she was, sprawled out on the comfy couch with her head in Elsa's lap, enjoying both the sound of Elsa's soothing voice and the feeling of warm fingers combing through her hastily unbraided hair. It was warm and safe and perfect.

"...and though Beauty could not leave, she couldn't shed a single tear. For she possessed all the books she could read, the food she could eat, and the wine she could drink. Her every wish, be it within the realm of possibility, was granted with great haste. And in time, she grew to enjoy the company of the terrible Beast."

"Elsa?"

A pause. "Yes, sunflower?"

"Do you think the Guardian is really that bad?"

The fingers stopped. It was only when Anna deliberately rubbed her head against them that they continued.

"Why?"

"No reason. I'm just curious."

Elsa sighed softly. "If pushed the wrong way, yes."

"What if we push it the _right_ way?"

Another sigh. "I wish it was that simple, Anna, but it's not. Have you forgotten what the Guardian has done? It kidnapped us. It all but dethroned our parents. It froze the city. And the people... Hundreds of people lived in Arendelle, Anna. _Hundreds_. They were all driven out of their homes with nowhere to go and almost none of their possessions. You've seen the houses; it is obvious that no one had time to pack anything but the essentials."

Actually, Anna _hadn't_ seen the inside of the houses. The doors and windows were all frozen shut with ice harder than she could break.

' _I guess Elsa saw some of them before they were sealed up. I wasn't allowed outside for a couple of years, so it's definitely possible.'_

"Any one of those things would be hard to forgive, but all of them?" Elsa shook her head. "And that's just what we know about..."

Not liking the negative turn the conversation had taken, Anna brought Elsa's free hand to her lips and placed a lingering kiss on it. She made _sure_ it was lingering, because apparently that was important.

Elsa's eyes widened and a faint blush appeared on her cheeks. "A-anna?"

Success.

Anna took a second to enjoy the blush, then continued, intentionally keeping her tone light and flippant. "I get what you're saying. It's just hard for me to picture the Guardian as a bad guy."

Elsa laughed, but her smile was genuine. "That's because you're a hopeless optimist."

"Am not!"

"Are so."

"Am _not!_ "

"Are so!"

" _Am not!"_

"Ha ha ha. Okay, okay, that's enough."

Anna pouted. "I totally would have won that."

"I'm sure. However, the fact remains that you haven't met the Guardian. I have. So if anyone is in the position to judge its character, it's me."

"Yeah, but... Look, it has never hurt you, right?"

"Right."

"And it hasn't threatened you or anything?"

"Correct."

"So, not a bad guy."

Elsa made the same kind of sigh she made when Anna suggested a 'one person, one fork' policy. "Like I said, it's not that simple. If it hurt me, you'd probably end up starving to death or something-"

"Hey!"

"-and nothing is going to hurt you as long as I'm around to stop it."

That last part was sweet (and a little terrifying to think about), but not as convincing as Elsa seemed to think. Anna doubted the Guardian could be lectured to death.

"Ok," she said, trying to spare her sister's feelings. "I have other reasons. ...Give me a second..."

Elsa gave her several. "Very convincing, Anna. Well done."

"Oh, shush. Wait, I've got one! If the Guardian is so bad, why does it bother fixing the castle? It could have just taken us to its cave."

"I'd assume it's because we're less likely to run away if we're comfortable. And really, Anna? A cave?"

"Of course. Where else would it live?"

"A house?"

Anna stared at Elsa like she'd just said the ocean was made of gravy. "What kind of a dragon lives in a house?"

"A dra-? You know what, nevermind. What other 'evidence' do you have?"

' _...I really should have thought this through.'_

Anna looked around with her head still in her sister's lap. Her eyes chanced across one of the library's windows and she stilled. When she spoke again, her voice was gentler. "...The windows are really beautiful."

Anna looked back at Elsa, expecting a skeptical response. Instead, the older girl was staring at the window. Anna couldn't place her expression. All she knew was that it was solemn and... complicated.

Hoping that it would make her argument more convincing (and knock Elsa out of her strange mood), Anna swiftly got up, took her sister's hand, and led her to it.

"Just look at this," she said enthusiastically, gesturing to the artwork. "Even if you ignore the picture - which you shouldn't - a _ton_ of effort had to go into making this. See how it looks kind of broken, but there are these clear little lines keeping it all together? Well, I read about something called stained glass, and it's made by arranging a bunch of colored glass shards into pictures. I'm pretty sure this is the same thing, but with ice."

Elsa absentmindedly nodded along, eyes fixed on the window.

"You knew that, didn't you? Sorry, sometimes I forget that you're older and remember stuff from... before. Anyway, can you believe that ice could come in so many shades? Most of this one is shades of blue and white, because -duh- _blizzard_ , but you can see some yellow sunlight breaking through the clouds at the top. There are a few more of these special windows, and some of them even have reds and greens!"

"It is... colorful, yes."

"And _she's_ gorgeous. Do you see her hair? It just fans out like _wow_. And her eyes are super intense. I would not want to get in her way."

"Neither would I."

"She looks a lot like you. Maybe that's intentional. Like, the Guardian must have some sort of interest in us if... Wait, am I rambling? I'm rambling. Sorry." Anna sheepishly ran a hand through her hair. "Um... what do you think, Elsa?"

Elsa turned to face Anna and shook her head. "It's not me. This was made years ago, remember? I was barely a teenager."

"Oh, right."

Anna wasn't going to lie; the outright dismissal stole some wind from her sails. Then again, she couldn't really complain because Elsa was right. The timing didn't match up.

' _They just look so similar...'_

"Anyway, I assume your point was that the windows indicate something about the Guardian's character?"

Anna nodded. "Yeah. If it was evil, why would it make artwork that is so beautiful and peaceful?"

Elsa quirked a brow.

"Ok, _this one_ isn't 'peaceful' per se. But most of the others are, so the point stands."

"...I honestly can't answer that question."

Anna barely stopped herself from cheering. ' _That was way easier than I thought it would be. We should've had this conversation years ago!'_

"However, that doesn't change the situation."

"Ugh!"

' _There it is.'_

Anna tried to storm off to the couch, but Elsa kept their hands locked. Anna relented, if only because she didn't want to drag her heavier sister across the entire room.

"Anna, I'm trying to be reasonable here."

"Try harder."

Elsa took Anna's other hand and then squeezed both. Anna tried really hard not to let that soften her attitude. She failed.

"Fine. Make your argument," she said.

"Thank you. Ok, here it is: Even if you are willing to forgive the Guardian, and even if, by some miracle, our parents are able to, do you really think the people will? They've been kept away from their homes for a decade and forced to endure who-knows-what in the meantime."

"The people don't need to accept it. Mom and Dad can just grant the Guardian amnesty or something. They could even give it guards!"

"By doing so, they'd become the most hated rulers in the world. Ignoring the will of the people may have been possible a few centuries ago, but now? There'd be a serious threat of revolution."

' _She may have a point there.'_

"Wait, did anyone actually see the Guardian when Arendelle was frozen? We could just keep it's identity a secret! Assuming it's a person."

"If it is a person, it would have to spend its entire life lying about who it is and what it's done."

"That... doesn't sound fun," Anna conceded.

"No, _it doesn't_."

Anna struggled to find words. Elsa was still holding her hands, but the girl was incredibly tense. ' _If she's getting upset, she must be closer to the Guardian than I thought. She did come around to the idea of it being good faster than expected...'_ Anna was surprised that she didn't feel happier about that.

"Why can't it just leave?"

Anna was shocked by her own bluntness and Elsa... After a flash of what Anna identified as shock and pain, any trace of emotion on her face was replaced with a cold mask. "Arendelle is its _home_ , Anna. I can't believe you'd-" The older girl cut herself off. Her grip tightened to the point where it was almost painful.

Her hands were _freezing_.

"Sorry," Anna said, not really knowing why she was apologizing. "I just... nevermind. I won't mention it again."

After several long seconds of what seemed like an internal battle, the mask was replaced with regret and Elsa's grip relaxed. "No, _I'm_ sorry. I overreacted. You were talking about the Guardian, not... something else."

' _What else would I be talking about?'_

Anna tried to move on. "Ok, well if, um, _that_ is out of the question, why don't we leave instead? We can find Mom and Dad, or maybe... maybe just explore the world. There's a lot of gold and jewelry in the treasury; we could live off it for years."

Elsa cautiously drew closer. "...You would want to do that? Travel the world with me?"

' _Oh my God, she's considering it.'_

"Yes, I would love to!"

Elsa slipped her right hand from Anna's and cradled her face. "...Just us?"

There was something hidden in that question that made Anna's heart race. "Y-yeah. Of course."

Elsa's thumb brushed Anna's cheek. Anna so focused on the warmth and softness of Elsa's hand that she didn't process what Elsa said next until it was withdrawn and she saw the small frown on Elsa's face.

"Wait. You'd... you'd really be okay with exploring the world instead of finding Mom and Dad?"

Well when you said it like _that_...

"That's not what I meant," Anna explained. "I would want to find them. Eventually. It's just not a huge deal."

Anna ignored the sharp stab of pain and guilt that shot through her heart. (Not to mention the surge of loneliness and anger.) She knew Elsa wanted her to miss their parents - as evidenced by the little anecdotes she occasionally gave about them - but Anna found it easier to not think about them. It made discussions like this - and painting Elsa's gift - really awkward.

"Anna, they're our _parents_."

Anna really didn't understand her sister sometimes. "If that's so important to you, then why are you so insistent on staying here?"

"Because it's not safe out there!"

Anna bit back a growl. ' _Stay civil,'_ she reminded herself. ' _The last thing we need is another big argument.'_

"Fine. No exploring. We'll go straight to Mom and Dad. They can protect us. Happy?" One look at Elsa's face, and Anna knew she wasn't. "What now? They're our parents. _They have an army_. They can protect us."

Elsa looked guilty, but it wasn't enough for her to budge. "Not against everything," she said softly. "Obviously."

' _She wants me to think the Guardian is dangerous but believe it will protect us. She wants to explore the world with me, but she won't out of loyalty to our parents. She wants me to miss Mom and Dad, but she's too afraid of the outside world to actually let me see them.'_

"I think I'm getting a headache."

"I'm sorry, Anna."

The redhead sighed. "I know."

The two returned to the couch. Anna took up her previous position because, well, what else was she supposed to do?

Soon enough, cold fingers were running through Anna's hair.

"You know, I would really hate to be on your head, Elsa. Everything seems so complicated to you. No offense."

Elsa laughed dryly. "None taken. I don't like being in here either, sometimes."

Anna wanted to say that it didn't have to be so complicated, that they could just make a choice and hope for the best. They may have to fight for it, but they could get a happy ending for everyone.

She didn't. Elsa was as stubborn as Anna, in her own way. She wasn't going to budge on this unless Anna somehow convinced her the world outside was safe. And how could Anna do that if Elsa all but refused to leave the castle?

Simple answer: she couldn't.

So, Anna decided to wait. She would wait and hope for divine intervention or for Elsa to finally come to her senses.

Anna squashed down her negative feelings and smiled up at the woman who had protected her throughout her entire life, who practically raised her. Elsa had spent a decade putting Anna first, making sure she was happy and healthy. Anna felt that this was the least she could do in return.

Elsa's world was complicated and scary, far more so than Anna could understand. It wasn't fair for her to make it worse.

It went against Anna's nature, but she would accept the stalemate. For Elsa.

' _For Elsa.'_

 **A/N: I went back through and read the previous chapters. I noticed a few errors which I am going to fix and I'm also shortening the A/N's. The only change that you need to know about is a slight one in chapter 1. I'm changing "(...) stupid nature walks (...)" to "(...) stupid nature walks-slash-rendezvous (..)", because that's when Anna thinks Elsa meets the Guardian. (Otherwise, it would be really suspicious for the castle to be repaired at that time.)**

 **Final note: I want to say thank you to the guest reviewers here because I can't respond to them directly. (On that note, I don't understand the one asking if this is "Frozen all over again". If you want a legitimate response, you're going to have to be a little more specific than that.)**


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